I finally made my plane reservation for July 6th at 10:25 pm. Since I’m traveling with pets, a nighttime flight made sense; there is a heat embargo when the weather is really hot, so they recommend an early or late flight.
My friend Jennifer from work told me something before I left school last week. She said that when a person is hesitant about a decision or commitment, the world seems topsy-turvy. But when you finally make a decision to do something, it’s as if all of the planets become aligned, and the puzzle pieces fit together perfectly. She was talking about me making a commitment to picking a day to leave Oregon for New York. So I decided to stop hesitating and make the reservation, and the plan seems to be more cohesive now.
To say I’m not scared or nervous would be a lie. I’m very scared and very nervous. It’s different making this change in your twenties, thirties or even forties, as we did when we came out here. But in your sixties, well that’s scary! Even though I thought about this decision for such a long time, and wondered if I would ever be nearer to my family again, the actuality of it is a bit mind-boggling. It really hit home at my moving sale where I literally gave away parts of the past 22 years for a mere pittance. Although the process is also cathartic, I still am amazed at how I parted with so much of the past.
So those chapters of my story are closed and the next one is starting. I realize I am the maker of my own destiny – I fuel the process. This next chapter will definitely run it’s course on a lot of faith.